If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
