I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
