I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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