so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Randomize