Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
