tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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