Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
