Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
