turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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