youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Randomize