Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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