drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize