i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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