Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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