He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
