The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
COCAINE IS GR8
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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