Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Come on in and take your pants off
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