weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
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