Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
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