Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
