hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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