You're completely useless in the revolution.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
