is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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