its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
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