I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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