I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Randomize
