I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
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