You're completely useless in the revolution.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize