Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
