I wannas sexs uuuuu
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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