margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
