Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
