Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
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