You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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