Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
