So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
