ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Randomize
