They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
