I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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