I'm laying in your front yard are you home
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Is it penis luge time yet?
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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