It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize