She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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