I'm drive I can fine osifer
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
