I have demons in me.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Someone came in the potted fern
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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