I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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