Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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