Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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