You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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