it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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