you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
